Author: Grinding For the Dream

Here, you'll see a variety of different people doing different things all grinding for the same dream -- to be someone in the world.

Changes – 2Pac

With failing the LSATs and having my last semester in college coming into an end, my mind is in a state of utter chaos.  The fact that I have no clue what I am doing my next semester frightens me.  The only inevitable outcome I do know is that there will be a dramatic change.  No longer will I have to plane back after subsequent breaks, but I will stay situated at home.  Furthermore, no longer can I distinguish between two homes (one that I dread the other a respite from the cruel harsh realities of my mediocrity).  For how much I despise this “other home”, I can not say I am a little depressed.  I do not really know why.  Possibly because of the grandiose ideas that I assumed I would have accomplished by now are finally being realized as being utter obscene failures.  Possibly because I have gotten close to a couple of people besides my girlfriend and leaving would mean I would never (almost never) see them again?  All in all, whether I can pinpoint it or not, I can say that I am sad.

Yet, amongst this change, will come new opportunities that seemingly could pop up.  There are a couple of projects that are queued right now, which hopefully can salvage some of the failure that is my college experience.  Hopefully by next month (if all goes well), there will be two websites that I will be busily working on.  And eventually, hopefully, I can have a meaningful life that people will actually be inclined to check out my thoughts and feelings on topics!  Also, in the next three weeks I will again battle the evil villain that is the LSAT, ready to finally impregnate her (because as we all knowo the LSAT is a bitch).  By then, I am hoping that all my applications will be sent and be waiting excitingly to hear the good news (hears to being optimistic!).  Until then, I will wallow in the misery in my head, awaiting the hazy clouds of the future.

My New Hero

“Mr Icahn is a fierce critic of the typical corporate boss, which, with a wit all too rare among Wall Street’s titans, he has turned into a theory of the “moronisation of American management.” The typical chief executive, he says, is “the guy you knew in college, the fraternity president—not too bright, back-slapping, but a survivor, politically astute, a nice guy”. To be a chief executive, you need to know how not to tread on anyone’s toes on the way up. You eventually become the number two, who “has got to be a little worse than the number one to survive”. When the number two becomes chief executive, he promotes someone a little worse than him as his second-in-command. “It is the survival of the unfittest,” reckons Mr Icahn. “Eventually we are all going to be run by morons.””

I think I found my new hero.

Come with me on a world of Pure Imagination

“The mind I love must have wild places, a tangled orachard where dark damsons drop in the heavy grass, an overgrown little wood, the chance of a snake or two, a pool that nobody’s fathomed the depth of, and paths threaded with flowers planted by the mind.”

I love people who are able to create an entire universe out of pure imagination – whether it be just being creative and just throwing one obscure object with another. It reminds me of the innocence and the innovative mind of a child. It’s these characteristics that allow us to escape from this world that we live in. It’s once a while that we need to realize that though this is our reality and that we must deal with it, we must once in a while just journey ourselves back to simplicity instead of making everything so damn complicated, and just accept things for what they are.

Yeah, this is going to be corny, but Yoda couldn’t have put it better himself. “Truly wonderful the mind of a child is.”

And this new Far East Movement song seriously reminds me of the forever classic Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Far East Movement – Rocketeer   (this song is damn catchy)

 

Willy Wonka – Pure Imagination 

No witty title this time

It’s about time I get on track and start writing again. I’ll try to keep a daily update of this or that, regardless of how irrelevant or interesting I consider my joke of a day is.

I guess to give an excuse to what I’ve been doing of late, is that I’ve been playing a lot of Halo. Haha, I know — a waste of my time right? Well, considering how I’m still on top of my school work, I’ve got to say that I’m pretty proud of myself. But while I’m doing my readings, doing my homework, I feel as if my writing is once again starting to deteriorate. I’m not able to flow as well anymore. But I guess that has to do with me reading less also. I’m kind of sad that I didn’t set my summer goal of reading a book a week to continue on once school started.

okay, you’re right. I have been wasting my time playing games. But honestly, it helps me take my mind off of some of the sorrows that have been surrounding me.

Well, I think this was a good semi-ramble/catch up of my life… kinda. Until next time, fellow fans.

Root of All Evil

I’ve been struck with the lazy bug, and since then, I haven’t been putting much of my thoughts onto paper or in this case, online. School and life or whatever’s just been so busy that I haven’t really had much time to write anything either — not that anything THAT interesting has really been happening… or maybe things have, BUT! as my title illustrates, I’ve been struck by the root of all evil – LAZINESS. Though my studies have improved, I’m more on top of my game, but I haven’t been writing, and as I can tell just from writing this post, I can tell that my writing abilities have turned to crap, and for that, I’m sorry to all our readers that you have to read this.

Anyways, enough about nonsense rambles about nothing. If there’s one thing I want to ramble or write about, it’s that I pray the best for the world. There’s just so much hate, pessimism, and narcissism in the world. Everyone just needs to relax, and enjoy the little things that make you happy.

 

I Lied

I am sorry, I lied.  First, luckyyykat.com is going to be mostly about music.  I realized I really hate stocks.  I do not enjoy it at all.  Although its a hobby, its something thats interesting but not so much that I would love to constantly write about.  Secondly, I did not quit poker.  I need money and its the only alternative that I have that would provide me the most capital.

Time Passes By

Sometimes on Facebook statuses I see posts that make me cringe.  No its not the superficial comments about their life etc.  Instead, I am talking about those comments when people want to grow up and start living beyond school.  Why are people so eager to work?  Why are people so willing to leave behind this relaxed no responsibilities attitude?  I sure as hell not.  That is why I am trying to postpone all that I can do to prevent me from working (or eventually find something that I don’t consider work but will make me money).  As my final semester slowly dissipates into thin air, more and more thoughts come into my head.  Similar to my other post, I am worried about the unpredictable nature of my future.  It used to be get good grades go to middle school.  Next four years, get good grades go to high school.  Next four years, get good grades go to college.  But what about now?  Am I sure to get into law school that I desperately yearn for?  Will I become an entrepreneur?  Will I eventually give up my strive for greatness, and realize that I am just only mediocre?  I am scared.  Scared of what is happening now.  Scared of whats going to happen tomorrow.  Yet within this fear, I know that I am living.  And from this living, I should make this the best possible semester ever.

It Comes Down to This

I can’t sleep.  My anxiety is eating me alive.  I don’t want my parents to be disappointed.  I can’t do that again.  I should be asleep by now, but the more I try, the more I fall into this pit of despair that is my opaque future.  I don’t like this feeling of unknowing.  I am scared.  H o ld me.  Ican’t do t h i s.  I don’t want to f a i l again.  Why is tomorrow coming so soon.  I am happy to be rid of this unwanted weight over my shoulders, but I feel as if it will continually be in the back of my head.  I think of the worst case scenarios and I dwell in my own self-affliction.  This stupid test is consuming me in ways that I couldn’t fathom.  It has destroyed the remnants of my self confidence, making me doubt my existence.  This fucking test is literally what will eventually lead to my pseudo success that I imagine in my head.  This is killing me softly with its song.  Making me doubt what I’m worth.  Yet, with that said, I still feel the warmth of people close to me.  Thank you all that support me.  It means so much.